Friday, August 20, 2010

Thinking sometimes hurts.

I'm sure you've all had moments... aha moments as Oprah call them. Last night I had a rather aha moment at about 2 in the morning. I had managed to sit and watch the last two episodes of the season finally for Work of Art. I've watched, intrigued the entire season and haven't understood a lot of the reasoning behind the judges comments and verdict. Then it came to me as I sat teary eyed and watched as Perigrin was so obviously moved by her own piece and then moved again as others "got it". Also as Abdi (my favorite from the start) presented an emotionally intense piece that I fully related to (a baptism). One or two of the judges in the end show finally started to make sense. They explained it a little more to my understanding at least by the end of the season. I usually have no problem admitting I'm wrong or no good at something, but this is a little embarrassing. I guess because I all these years, going way back to crayons on the walls... I've always felt in my heart I was to create stuff and try to be good at it. Even as now, I am 40 years of age and probably done with half of my life... and I've up until last night thought I was to try to do my best at creating something... technically. I've apparently missed the bus all these years because I think I now get it. It's not how good an artist you are... like how well I can draw say an apple and make the viewer see a great drawing of an apple. It's how I can reach down in my soul and pull out something that can make the viewer feel something. Something that I felt as I created it. Wow.

I've always felt like I was the artist outside looking in at the better artists. Maybe that is why I have such a blank canvass syndrome. You know, when I have a blank page in front of me and I can't for the life of me think of a single thing to draw. That I can't draw it that well so I don't even attempt it. I need to draw from within. I've just learned that and I hope that I can learn to do that.

How do you "draw" from within?

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6 comments:

  1. That is a powerful Ah ha!

    There are always going to be times when you have a creative block, I think most creative people do. You know if you didn't you would be working all the time and it would become rote.

    I definitely experienced that in college and have used it to know when I can push myself and when to leave well alone and it will come back.

    I absolutely LOVED work of art and Abdi was my Fav. too, such an amazingly good soul at such a young age.

    Have a lovely weekend, T. :)

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  2. Jaime, I absolutely understand what you're saying here. I caught only one episode of that show, wishing that I'd watched it from the beginning and completely lost what day it was on...it was last weeks episode.

    I've always had that deep down within me, desire to create and have found myself distracted with so many options that I get defeated. I, too, see how much more beautiful one might write, or draw, or paint, or sew...I see others who sell their work, knowing that I could but somehow feel held back because of my own insecurities.

    I love this post. You've inspired me and reminded me of what flows through me and the why of it...the truth in the leading ♥

    Now, to answer, "How do I draw from within?"....I pray and I listen, I get inspired through reading and I dive into a blank page...not test the water, but dive right in.

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  3. Don't sweat the small stuff is what I always say...re-connect with the world around you and I know you will find inspiration!!! I do each and every day!!! and always be grateful...morning and night....

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  4. What a wonderful inspirational post! I have watched several episodes of Work of Art. Very educational. I draw from within by trying to achieve some degree of "peacefulness" and, while listening to music, just start "playing".... sketching, letting my mind bring forth what we all possess....creativity! It often falls short of my expectations, but I am also often surprised by something wonderful I didn't know I could create. Never stop!!

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  5. Much food for thought here, Jaime. I have been drawing and creating since I was little. I remember feeling disillusioned in college when I "had" to produce certain work. I like to create what makes me happy - be it the knit creations or the jewelry or the art work. If I'm not happy making it, and it doesn't speak to me personally, then it just won't work. I'll tear up sketches and rip out knitting if it doesn't appeal to me. If I'm not happy with what I'm creating, then how can anyone else be? That's how I think of it.
    My hubby and I pretty much agreed with the judges' decisions on Work of Art. I found in the end that I strongly connected with Peregrine's work. I was a fan of Abdi's since the beginning - his enthusiasm was so contagious. And he was indeed most successful when he created "from the heart."
    Theresa :)

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I love it that you are wanting to comment but please know that I have moved my current blog (this is the old host). You can now find me at www.jaimehaney.com/blog and leave a comment there. This very same post is on there, as I have picked up the whole kit and kaboodle and moved it. I hope to see you! Please come by and say howdy!

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